Featuring the following heroine!

Princess Python

by Ray Schaff

Real name: Zelda DuBois

First appearance: Amazing Spider-Man 22

Favorite quote: "All right, Clown -- but be gentle with him! He's rather cute -- in an offbeat sort of way!" (The Princess holds an all-too-chivalrous Spidey by the arms so her teammates can move in for victory... Spidey's victory to be precise. You almost gotta wonder how she found a masked teenager in a red-and-blue bodysuit to be "cute" before recalling how she related to snakes...)
Most frequently used word, circa 1972 to 1981: "Precious", as in "Strike, my Precious!", "Did he hurt you, Precious?", ad nauseum.

Team affiliation: Princess Python is both a longtime member and "the looker" of the Ringmaster's Circus of Crime, infrequently known as the Masters of Menace (a name she came up with). Perhaps seeking steadier income, Zelda joined the second Viper's Serpent Squad; years later she found fitting in with the Serpent Society more difficult than she had remembered. There was also a stint as Mistress of Ceremonies on Superia Cruise Lines, but I'd avoid that whole thing if I were you.

Abilities: Princess Python is a highly talented trainer of -- you guessed it -- pythons. I'm talking large freakin' snakes (at least two to date) that attacked whomever she told them to no matter their size; this often ended with her beloved pet being swung like a club or tied in knots, much to her horror. Miss DuBois is quick on her feet and knows how to use an electric prod, not to mention those feminine wiles of hers.

Favorite storyline: In her very debut, she of the fishnet stockings helped the Circus choose a new leader and later held her own against a young Web-Head, halfway unmasking him at one point. I also get some guilty pleasure from vague memories of the Circus crashing the Wasp's ill-advised wedding to Straitjacket -- I mean Yellowjacket (Avengers 60). Zelda's attempted kidnapping of Tony Stark was OK until halfway or two-thirds through (Iron Man 50). Hey, plans like those take chutzpah, if little common sense.

Least favorite storyline: That Iron Man issue took a decidely weird turn when the Princess's precious python got soaked in chemicals to become repulsor-resistant, then fell into a vat of acid. Seeing as how the grief-stricken Princess tried to jump in after it (!), you can understand why Zelda didn't endanger its replacement by bringing it along for her Serpent Society stint.

 This proved to be a measly string of cameos; her longest scene was spent whining to Captain America that she's "just a snake charmer" who would die fighting real bad guys like Modok (Cap 313). Two issues later she was tortured for her lack of loyalty. More recently there was an unreadable mess of a back-up story in Spider-Man Team-Up 5, featuring a Grim and Gritty (and really ugly) Circus of Crime, a gun-toting Elf named Relf, thinly-disguised useless appearances by Savage Dragon and Destroyer Duck, and poor ol' Ben Reilly, whose Spider-Clone stories looked good next to this fiasco... Ray's probably too young to remember the Elf With A Gun storyline in Defenders with the same fondness as us old 'uns -- Editor any-Elf-appearance-is-a-good-appearance Jeanne